Sunday 17 August 2014

12) Duelling Squirrel Cults (Romeo and Juliet)

The Montamunks and Capulnuts had been the fiercest rivals Verona Park had ever seen. Millions of acorns had been spent on new technology such as flying squirrels, and it was reaching a critical point. Public unrest had been achieved long ago, and small injuries had been caused, but no blood had been shed. Yet.

This battle was not just a nuisance for the other squirrels in Verona Park. Two lovers, Hameo and Squirriet, were separated because of the fued between their families. Although he wished no part of the fighting, Hameo’s best friend Mercutirat was slain by the house of Capulnuts and revenge had to be taken. Yet this revenge led to banishment from Verona Park and a sentence to spend the rest of his days at local subway station.

Squirriet couldn’t bear to be apart from her love. She sought out the local Friar, who wore a black cloak over his bushy tail. They concocted a plan that would involve her pretending to die and the Friar would inform Hameo of the scheme. The problem is, Hameo got tired of the buskers covers of George Michaels songs and left to seek Squirriet on his own accord. The message didn’t reach him.

At the sacred tree where Squirriet was lying, peaceful looking and under the influence of the fake wasp venom, Hameo entered. For all the acorns in his mouth he would give to have her back, but it was not possible. Poison had taken his love away. There was no place for him in this rotten nut filled world. With the last drabs of the wasp venom he declared his love to Squirriet and drank. Squirriet woke just in time to see the venom take the last life from Hameo’s eyes. It did not take her long to find a sharp tree branch, and end her suffering.


For never was a story of more woe, than this squirrel-abridged version of Squirriet and Hameo.

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